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I cannot believe that I’m already in week four. It’s my 23rd day since I started doing intermittent fasting, and I have now had 22 “green” days in MyFitnessPal (days within the calorie limit). My calories are set to maintenance, for the time being, mostly because it helps me not be such a perfectionist. In my case, perfectionism has almost always been the reason all other attempts at losing weight have crashed and burned.

I do feel hungry now and then, but it’s such a relief to not have to think about food all the time, to not worry so much about what to eat. Yes, I try to eat healthy foods, but being very rigid has never worked at all for me. It works well for perhaps a week, but then I end up giving up, resulting in an even worse diet. I’m only ever hungry in the morning anyway.

So far I’ve lost 3.5 kg in exactly three weeks. I had expected to perhaps lose one kg in this time, since (again) my calorie limit is set to maintenance. I have more energy. I feel stronger. I don’t have any intense food cravings anymore, but I enjoy food more. I eat foods that I want and foods that taste good, and often it’s just a matter of timing – leaving the most calorie-rich foods to days when I’ve worked out a great deal and have room for extra calories. But I haven’t really wanted the most calorie-dense foods anyway, and I don’t eat nearly as much of them as I used to do. The funny thing is that I seem to tolerate a lot of foods better.

Some of this might of course also be attributed to the fact that I’m not on antidepressiva any longer. I did notice a change in the three days between starting intermittent fasting and quitting the pills, I think, but it’s impossible to say for sure. I’m happy, in any case.

My mother visited me last weekend, and she said I looked far more like myself than I have done for the past few years. She said I looked more energetic and “alive” and did not notice any instability, mood-wise. She notices these things very easily – we went shopping for an entire day and were not even close to having any sort of argument or even irritation. That’s a first for us (not that we always argue, we argue very little, except when we are both tired and stressed and hungry). We went for walks, talked a lot, laughed a lot and had a great time.

I am really, really happy that I’m not just imagining that I am more energetic and alert without my meds, but that others think so too. I sleep better – I sleep less, and need more time to fall asleep (which isn’t so strange since my meds helped me sleep), but I actually feel well rested when I wake up. Which… I haven’t felt in years. For the past four or five years it didn’t matter if I slept four hours or fourteen, I always felt fatigued. No longer, thankfully…

I am looking forward to the next week. Hopefully the weight loss continues, but if it doesn’t, well, I’m not worried. Even if it has gone fast these past three weeks, I fully expect it to slow down at some point, and when it does, I’ll make the necessary adjustments. The most important thing is to keep up the good habits and not become stressed by them (we all know what stress does to fat burning…)

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